Silence

I hear silence

I hear the streams of nothingness bounce off the walls of my mind

This stillness plays a familiar tone I have come to know

It beats the dud rhythms that I identify with more often than not

But I have to defy the articles of the law to do some justice to it

The true laws of grammar and the way of words

Permit me also to scale the walls of conventional literature

Do not be offended by my rebellion of everything conventional

I just don’t buy that shit

Now with words of a king I am here to proclaim silence my queen

She waits for me as I draw away from the world and mankind

She is always patient to make sure that we are both alone

I remember when I first met her

It was a long time ago, about my earliest memories

It was when I was first plagued by consciousness

When I first realized I had feet and teeth

Silence was my first love

Always there to embrace me when the world declared itself my enemy

She saved me when I was drowning in all the bullshit around me

She kissed me with the deepest passion when loneliness made mockery of me

Yes, silence is my first love

And we’ve both had a long thing going for a long time coming

One time, we had our unusual lovers’ spat and I turned to my brother for help

He rained my praises everywhere I went

And she got jealous, I couldn’t understand why

She was always jealous of people that posed no threat to her

So she made enemies with everyone and everything

My brother, my family, my friends, school, I mean everything that you can put together in words

I didn’t realize she had left me until one time when I needed her

When everyone around me seemed to fornicate with foolishness

And dwelt only on the surface of things

I have to admit that I floated to the surface too

Maybe that was why we had the problem

I took out my weight and just left her in the deep and went my way

Their way, the way of the world

Until I found that I couldn’t do without her

That my whole essence depended on her

That with her I could find the completeness that I sought

Then I started to seek her

I started to crave her voice

And all those conversations we had with no words

I remembered once again, all the peace she offered

And her selfless love, the kind I was counting on to help me find her now.

 And that memory did serve a good purpose

Slowly I started to ebb down that familiar road to her house

I closed up the books, turned off my friends

Made my way to the gate and boarded a cab home

I rushed through the door like I always did

The sound of automobiles receding behind me

I flung my bag to the floor, it’s usual place-anywhere on the floor that is

Slumping to my bed, I started to tune off the loudest noises

I made it down to the smaller details eventually

The distant voice of a radio from the next compound

The blue birds chirping away their time on the branches

The occasional tips and taps of random sounds

Could she be behind those drapes that seem to be hiding more than the view?

I didn’t wait for the answer to that question

I peeled back the curtains and made my way to her

I followed the sun, and everything beautiful it had to show me

And I got to the clearest of waters, so true I could only think of one thing

I dove in and went as deep as I could

So deep that not even the sound of my thoughts could venture

I made it to hers

And she stood as she opened the door, just before I knocked

Clearly she was waiting for me

The delight in her face paralyzed me when I realized I didn’t bring her anything

I was not only paralyzed, I was lost

I couldn’t find the words I had rehearsed in the mirror

Yet she figured me out and swallowed all my doubts in one embrace

Then came the release

The usual letting go of things that only the two of us were used to

But you couldn't rule out the awkwardness as we made an effort to adjust